A Tribute to Discontinued Cereals
Rice Krinkles
Rice Krinkles are not to be confused with Kellogg’s counterpart Rice Krispies (although on a related not here’s a box of Rice Bubbles). They were similar to a sugar coated Rice Krispies in taste, but shaped like a Fruity Pebble. Although probably considered politically incorrect today, the mascot was a little Chinese boy named So-Hi. So high was also what happened to one’s blood sugar after eating a bowl of this stuff. Post also made Sparkled Flakes as a substitute for Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes.
Pop-Tarts Crunch
Kids love Pop-Tarts, often eating them for breakfast. But it took until 1995 for Kellogg’s to realize that the snack could be shrunk down to fit on your spoon. Actually, there may be a reason for that. When Pop-Tarts first rolled out in the 1960s, instructions to store managers emphatically stated that, “In no way should this product be sold as a substitute for cereal.” Even Kellogg’s wouldn’t admit the connection, and it took thirty years for them to come to grips with the similarities. I guess it didn’t matter too much as the cereal failed. Despite all the varieties of Pop-Tarts, the cereal only came in two flavors, frosted strawberry and brown sugar cinnamon. File this one under the wish-we-could forget category for Pop-Tarts, just like the Chocolate Peppermint, Frosted Peanut Butter and Jelly, and Chocolate and Cherry Chip flavors.
S’mores Grahams (a.k.a. S’mores Crunch)
S’mores Crunch launched in 1982 as chocolate graham cracker cereal filled with tiny marshmallows pieces similar to those found in packets of powdered hot chocolate mix. The S’morecerer tried to entice you to buy it, but his magic failed as it was discontinued in the late 1980s. Resurrected in the 1990s as S’mores Grahams, it has since been re-discontinued. Oh how General Mills teases us with this cereal. Kellogg’s did introduce Smorz in 2002, which is a related cousin of this fallen General Mills version. Maybe its not the same, but you can still buy Smorz.
Waffelos (1979-1984)
Waffelos was “a sweetened cereal with artificial maple syrup flavor” made to resemble eating buttermilk waffles. Although I have no idea why they misspelled waffle in the name. Waffelo Bill and his Horse rode for Waffelos as its cowboy spokesperson. And yes, the horse’s name was simply Horse! Waffelos also came in a blueberry variety for a short time. It featured simple minded Blueberry Critters with smiley faces that bounced around the desert. Waffelo Bill attempted to them round up, shouting, “Gidyap, gidyap, lil’ blueberry critters”. As one might guess, the cereal tasted “like crunchy little blueberry waffles”.
French Toast Crunch (1995-2008)
A member of the Cinnamon Toast Crunch family (which for a time also included Peanut Butter Toast Crunch), the original French Toast Crunch was sold in red boxes and shaped like little French toast slices, reminiscent of the style of Cookie Crisp. More recently, it was packaged in yellow boxes and resembles the sprinkled squares of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, only lighter in color. It was only recently discontinued, so you still may be able to find some of the newer version of the cereal.
Vanilla Wafer Cookie Crisp (Late 1970s-Early 1980s)
In a true injustice to cereal lovers, Vanilla Cookie Crisp was taken away all too early. It was just like today’s Cookie Crisp, except that the cookies were small and vanilla flavored. Cookie Jarvis was the cereal magician peddling this concoction, and it’s quite possible that the sneaky scorcerer put something very addictive in the recipe. As he would say, “I’ve come from afar to change your dish into a cookie jar! Heehee…Spelunk, spelar!”
E.T. Cereal (1984-?)
It seems there are two schools of thought when it comes to what exactly E.T. Cereal was. Everyone agrees that the cereal itself was in the shape of little Es and Ts. However, some say it was a Cap’n Crunch taste-a-like with yellow corn flavor. Don’t listen to those people, because they would be wrong. The extra-terrestrial represented a peanut butter and chocolate flavored cereal, much like his favorite candy from the movie Reese’s Pieces. Not that it mattered all that much. The cereal was short lived, and it wouldn’t surprise me to find some of the boxes buried in the desert with all those Atari games.
Batman Cereal (1989-1990)
It seems like there was a period when any popular movie or cartoon would be made into a cereal and odds favored it would be a Cap’n Crunch knock-off. Batman fell right into the trap, with its little yellow corn bat bits. Although Cap’n Crunch didn’t have a Batman bank attached to the front of the box (Later versions came with mini Batman comics). The cereal came out at the height of the first movie’s reign, siphoning a great deal of its popularity and parent’s money. Of course Ralston was pumping out so many tie-in fads that most grocery stores couldn’t clear enough space on its shelves. That pushed many a box to the dollar store in quick time, and often an unceremonious demise. The release of Batman Returns gave Ralston a do-over on the Batman cereal, and they went back to their standard chex and marshmallows formula. I guess you could call the chex pieces “Bat Nets.”
Fruity Marshmallow Krispies (1980-mid 1990s)
This cereal actually started as the red-boxed Marshmallow Krispieswith plain multi-colored marshmallows and eventually added “Fruity” to the title as the marshmallows morphed into fruit shapes. The box also turned green and overall it was a definite improvement. Either version was basically an amped up version of the pseudo-healthy Rice Krispie line, so I’m sure kids won out on both incarnations. The commercial was also a winner, featuring Snap, Krackle, and Pop in a conga line with dancing fruits set to a memorable reggae beat:
Wackies (1960-?)
Where to start on this one? Wackies were described as an “all oat cereal with sweet banana flavor bits” in wacky shapes like “banana bingles”, “banana jangles”, “oat gloops”, and “oat glots”. I have no idea what that means. It was hawked by Wackies Boy and the Banana Wackies Gorilla, and both appear hopped up on something. Hopefully it’s just sugar, but you can judge for yourself:
KOMBOs
Coming in orange, strawberry, and chocolate flavors, KOMBOs was plugged by the curious exotic beast, the Blue Gnu. Yes, a gnu is a real animal, although it doesn’t come in blue and it’s doubtful kids would know what it was (hint: an African antelope). The odd choice doesn’t exactly strike familiarity in the way a tiger, rabbit, or leprechaun do. According to Blue Gnu, “Kellogg’s Kombos put more in your morning. Get G-Gnawing on them soon!” Yes, I will get right on that.
Nut ‘n Honey Crunch
What I remember most about this cereal was the commercial. And if you saw it, you probably would too. Basically it involved people mistaking the name of the cereal for the line “Nothing, Honey!”. Here’s YouTube to the rescue:
Morning Funnies (1988-1989)
The concept on this one sounds like a winner. People like to eat cereal while reading the morning comics, so why not stick the comics right on the box? Available in several “Commemorative Editions”, each box was filled front and back with recognizable comic strips. The back panel even folded out to reveal another full page. Resident comics included Family Circus, What A Guy, Hi and Lois, Dennis the Mennis, Luann, Tiger, Beetle Bailey, and Marvin. Later editions added Popeye, Hagar the Horrible, and Funky Winkerbean. The cereal itself was “funny faces of wild fruit taste.” Here’s the problem: the comics lacked the heavy hitters such as Far Side, Peanuts, Garfield, etc… And you could easily read through all of them in one sitting. Once you’d read them, what was the point of eating the cereal anymore? Although I suppose one can always live by the tagline,”When you ask for Morning Funnies, you’re asking for some fun!”
Crispy Critters (1962-?, 1987-1988)
Indubitably delicious? Debatable. Crispy Critters came out in the 1960s and was re-issued by Post in the late 1980s. Both attempts proved unsuccessful and it was discontinued. The cereal was basically miniature animal crackers in shape, appearance, taste, and texture. However, some later boxes featured the addition of pink elephants, orange moose, and grape apes. Yes, the same pink elephants you see when you’re drunk. Not sure what the message was there. Originally pawned off by Linus the Lionhearted as “the one and only cereal that comes in the shape of animals,” he was replaced by a puppet named “Crispy” with pom-pon antennae and a furry yellow body in the 1980s. Also take note of the de-evolution of Linus. During the 1960’s his appearance changed. He lost his tophat, vest, and beard, and gained a bulbous snout and became more cartoonish. Then he disappeared for many years and this Crispy guy appeared. I hope that’s not what happens when you eat this cereal.
Team Flakes (1950s-early 1990s)
For a change, we’ll turn to something on the healthy side of the cereal spectrum. Well, at least somewhat healthy. All this cereal was were flakes, but it was a four grain flake consisting of corn, oats, rice, and wheat. The team part is probably in reference to the “team” the four grains make when unified, plus its “the cereal that plays along with you.” Unusually tasty and sort of puffy, the closest thing around now is probably General Mill’s Curves Cereal Whole Grain Crunch or to a lesser extent Crispix. The cereal was reportedly discontinued when Post bought out the Nabisco cereal line in the early 1990s.
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Quisp and Quake cereals. Mid to late sixties. They were advertised like mad on Saturday morning cartoon programs.
:-)
You’ll find Quake near the bottom of page 2 of this very article
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I was hoping to see Halfsies (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halfsies) on this list. It was the first cereal sweetened with Nutrasweet. Me and a buddy of mine were obsessed with it, I’m surprised we didn’t single-handedly keep it in business.
You forgot Triples cereal.
When a single Sprinkle Spangle became lodged in my throat, I almost choked to death as an eight year old. I’d never been so afraid in my life.
The experience was enough to keep me from adding a box to the cart on subsequent grocery trips.
Wow, epic dude. Totally cool man!
WHERE ARE S’MORES??
BEST….CEREAL…..EVER!!
What about Nintendo cereal?
What about Kroonchy Starz? A glaring omission!
I was hoping to see Clackers (http://www.theimaginaryworld.com/greasy23.jpg) listed, just to remind myself that I did, indeed, eat a bajillion boxes of those things. My dad worked at the General Mill packing plant in West Chicago, Illinois and was able to buy cereal in bulk with a ridiculous employee discount (something like a dollar a case). As I recall, Clackers were originally test-marketed under the name “Graham Rosettes.” Early on each box had a little plastic noisemaker inside, called a “Clacker Quacker.” Truly an annoying device, it drove my parents insane. Which made it the perfect toy for a 14-year-old.
What? No Post Oat Flakes — probably the best tasting cereal there was!
Yet another site rips off an X-Entertainment article.
You also forgot Kellogg’s Graham Crack-O’s brought to you by George the Milkman… 1978 or so… The New Godzilla cartoon on NBC was on…
Great article! I wonder why Oreo took down there cereal, I’m sure it lasted more then ten years in the market because it was selling well, so something strange there for sure.
What about the Nintendo and Batman Cereals?
Where’s “Kaboom”? and wasn’t there a “Pee Wee Herman” cerial, and the puffed rice in the duck shaped container, and “Quangaroos”( something along with “Quake”?
Then there was the 1980’s “Count Chocula” with the “too close for comfort” Nazi themed medal around it’s neck…
I also remember some bizarre geometric/mathematical symbol shaped frosted oats that gave away little grey nuclear aircraft carriers that “flung” even littler A4 jets – 1969 or so – maybe something like “Orbits” or something?
And of course “Sugar Smacks!” Nothing like some glucose with your heroin in the morning, eh?
And yes, I had both a “Quake” miners hat (with real light) AND a “Quisp” pink propeller beanie (uses 2 AA batteries not included!)…
[...] by Jason Wu on March 5, 2009 http://www.gunaxin.com/a-tribute-to-discontinued-cereals/11570/3 I really loved eating this [...]
HELLO MY NAME IS CRISPY, HOW DO YA DO? CRISPY CRITTERS CEREAL’S ENTIRELY NEW!!!
Reading the article brought back so many memories… If I could pick a couple cereals back from the grave it would be Chocolate Cookie Crisp and Blueberry Waffelos, man those were good!
These are all NEW cereals! How about Kellog’s PEP? I imitate it now by crunching Wheaties up very fine!
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Ok, so the TMNT cereal is on here, but you failed to mention the short run of Pizza-flavored marshmallows? For shame.
It was disgusting, but it was interesting nonetheless.
Hidden Treasures (approx 1994-1995) was the best. I bought a box on eBay and hung it on my wall.
I miss Kenmai Rice Bran and Fruity Marshmallow Krispies to this day.
This list is not complete without Pacman Cereal: http://www.tomheroes.com/Video%20Games%20FS/video%20games/burbs/memorabilia/pacman_cereal_box.htm
It was my fav when I was younger.
Banana Frosted Flakes look just like Special K Blueberry (obviously with a different fruit).
My favorite had to be the Oreo O’s. God, those were delicious.
These are great, I remember some of these when I was a kid, brought back some great memories!
Hell LO? Croonchy Stars???
http://bit.ly/CLMRf
i call SHENANIGANS on the individual who discontinued the best cereal ever, RICE KRISPIE TREATS CEREAL. <3
I have talked to Cap’n Crunch in reference to the OOP’S all berries return and they said to expect a return in 201X read more to find out when at http://www.blakeleitch.com
:) Love this post…
You know what cereal I miss? Count Chocula..you can’t find that anywhere anymore. Those marshmallows and chocolaty goodness..where’d you go???
French Toast Crunch still exists.
At least in Canada.
I work for a packaging design that just refreshed the look.
The new blue boxes are on the shelves now.
what aout ARCHIES cereal. they looked like honeycombs and once came with a cutout record on the back that actually played. AWESOME
forgot “waffle crisp” …
Kudos and Dugg for OJ’s! I absolutely loved that cereal as a kid and could only get it when I visited my grandmother because my parents refused to buy it for me. Thanks Grandma!
Bigg Mixx 1990-1992 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bigg_Mixx
What freaked out parents about Smurf Berry Crunch was not that it turned poop weird colors (it didn’t), it was that it turned the milk and the inside of your mouth bright blue. It was so heavily saturated with dye that you got a buzz off the chemicals. (Which is why I bought it.) The stuff made Fruity Pebbles seem healthy. From what I remember it was a re-dyed version of Captain Crunch Crunchberry cereal.
FREAKIES!
What about Nesquik cereal that turned your milk into chocolate milk, that was bomb. Also the first iteration of French Toast Crunch was far better than the new version(gross).
Awwwww….. What tribute to discontinued cereals is complete without MOONSTONES! Moonstones & Freakies were required eating during Saturday Morning Cartoons!
Thanks for taking me back!
General Mills needs to bring back hidden treasure cereal…
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How could anyone forget Nut ‘N Honey. Especially the commercials.
What about Double Dip Crunch???
How ’bout bringing some of these back??
Um, what about Kaboom? You know the one with the cartoon clown on the cover? How could it be overlooked? I wish that cereal was still around It was so damn great!
anyone remember pro stars?? mmmmmm
Great tribute!
You hit all of mine except for (as Brooke mentioned) Kellogg’s Rice Krispies Treats Cereal
Wasn’t there a “Where’s Waldo” Cereal too?
Does anyone remember rice crinkles?
For those complaining about the omission of Kaboom and Rice Krispy Treats cereal…I guess you like the pretty pictures, but you don’t read.
We pay tribute to these sweet breakfast addictions and their psychedelic ad campaigns. In my research I did find some good news, however. Fans of Kaboom!, King Vitaman, and Quisp will be happy to know these favorites still survive, and can easily be purchased online. Even a relatively new favorite like Rice Krispie Treats cereal is still around. But for every success, many failed to receive their stay of execution. And it’s for those we can only hope one day they are resurrected. Until then we only can hope, remember, and curse the cereal killers.
[...] A tribute to discontinued cereals. [...]
Actually most of the cereals people posted on in the comments are in the article. People either don’t read or don’t scroll through the pages.
I’m not going to blame people for not wanting to read all the pages. But don’t complain that Nintendo cereal, Batman cereal, Croonchy Stars, or Rick Krinkles aren’t in there. Because they are.
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Duuuuude, what a step back in time!!! I must admit I was pretty pumped to hear that Rice Krispy Treats Cereal is still available on the black market…lol
the grocery store i used to work at still sells kaboom! rice krispy treats cereal, and king vitamin. so if your in the north alabama area you can pick up some of those.
What about Rocky Road cereal, that was my favourite until it disappeared.
Wow. I had forgotten about some of those. I think I have eaten 90% of the cereals you mention. And I miss A LOT of them. :(
Love your post, it’s GRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!
I have an idea why they misspelled waffle in the name:
Waffelo Bill is a play of words on Buffalo Bill. ~M
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BOYCOTT KELLOGGS products.
After they fired Michael Phelps because there was a picture with him with a bong, they should be boycotted. Subway Sandwiches did not. Eat at the Subway burn your Kellogg’s products and don’t buy more.
I don’t know if its been discontinued, but I haven’t seen Rice Krispy Treats cereal in forever. That stuff was incredible.
Captain Crunch with chocolate milk can still be had! :O )
WHERE THE FUCK IS COUNT CHOCULA?!?!??!?!?!?
I remember BucWheats (I’m 41)! They were really good, with substantial flakes and less overt sweetness than the rest of these. They probably also had the most nutritional value of anything on this list, but I’m going to guess more sugar overall.
Clackers!!
Mmm I just had a bowl of Waffle Crisp but they’re not sold around here… I didn’t realized they discontinued them in certain locations, until I randomly had a craving of them. After walking down the cereal isle about 10 times I was sad to find they didn’t have any. Luckily you can import some from Amazon.com- but you have to buy them by the 5-box bulk.
I miss Berry Kix/Berry Captin Crunch/ & Boo Berry also..
cheers
I am remembering a cereal we used to get at the Grocery Outlet in CA (where discontinued products go to die) it was kinda like granola but chocolately. Damn I wish I could remember the name. For some reason something like Coco Moco is in my head although I know it wasn’t that.
what about alphabet cereal? or the rice krispy treats cereal?
Why are all you morons asking about Count Chocula? Do you never go grocery shopping? It’s been in every store I’ve ever been in.
These are awesome!
I really wish I could try some dunkin donuts cereal.
You forgot Rice Krispy Treats cereal!!!!!!
Why, oh for God’s sake WHY can’t you get Frankenberry/Booberry/Count Chocula unless it’s Halloween? And there was certainly no need to discontinue Fruit Brute!
[...] A tribute to discontinued cereals. [...]
you missed a very special one; muppet babies croonchy stars: http://www.muppetcentral.com/collectibles/muppetpics/food_stars.jpg
Nice list fellas! Where is the PAC-MAN cereal? It had pac-man marshmellows in it, as well as GIANT PAC-MAN marshmellows after he ate the power pellets!! LOL!
I miss one from the 60’s called ” Frosty O’s ” with a Dudley Do Right on the front.” Post Fortified Oat Flakes ” was another great.
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big ups for this article. i am a huge 80s cereal head and i was big into ice cream cones. thats insane it was only around for a year, as it impacted me profoundly. i am gonna try to find that commercial and put it on youtube before i die. i can still remember the song so well “my names ice cream jones, with a cereal called ice cream cones” word up to 1987.
theres so many cereals i miss on here!
excellent work.
cheers
I love kenmai rice bran! it used to be my personal favorite. I would buy it all the time as a teenager. i like special K as a substitute, but not the same. :(
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i loved the french toast crunch in the red box….. it was probably discontinued because they changed the cereal so noone wanted to buy it.
no crispy critters?! for shame!
Team Cheerios, marketed for the Olympics in the late 90s/early 2000s, were the BEST freaking Cheerios there were. I wish they still made them. =(
i want pinkpnther flakes!!!!!
i really wish everyday that smores crunch would come back i love them
I miss the Pokemon cereal from the late 1990’s and early 2000’s. From what I remember, it was just like Lucky Charms, but with Pokemon-shaped marshmallows.
I wish the Sprinkle Spangles could come back
Anyone remember Fruit Island Cereal? I think it was out between 1986 and 1988…I can’t remember much except that it was a fruity flavor and it tasted much better than the fruit flavored cereals that were on the market at the time.
Though I’m a guy, I loved the rainbow brite cereal…it was almost intoxicating!
This really pisses me off.Iv searched everywhere online 2 try 2 find anything that mimics the flavor of Pacman or Smurfberry Crunch cereal.I will pay the highest amount 2 get consumers 2 get this cereal or a flavor like these back on the markets.
I want Sprinkle Spangles and Rice Crispy Treats Cereal Sooooooooooooooooooo bad!
Great Article! Reminds me of the good old days!
I miss Cinnamon Krunchers, it was 100x better than Cinnamon Toast Crunch was, hands down.
thats so stupid that they discontinued my fav ceril oreos
IT’S NOT A KIDS CEREAL – BUT WHAT ABOUT THOSE HUGE SHREDDED WHEATS…LIKE 6 LOGS/CAKES TO A BOX?
Kaboom! Poor man's Lucky Charms
there is a poll on facebook to bring back vanilla vrunch
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I LIVED off of the old French Toast Crunch. I’m surprised the amount my family ate alone didn’t keep it alive. The red box kind, not the atrocious newer kind and the Cinnamon Toast Crunch where the flavor is washed off as soon as the milk hits it. Oreo O’s were a sugar kick in the face but ridiculously good. We bought the cereal instead of the cookies themselves. Until they freaking stopped making it. Waffle Crisp. Oh, Waffle Crisp. You can get the Eggo Waffle Cereal, but it really just isn’t the same. *sigh*
The old stuff was childhood memories in a box and these mean old curmudgeons and cereal dictators keep wiping all the good cereals off the face of the earth.
Getting rid of cereals because of the response of parents who don’t want sugary cereal for their kids sucks. What about the old kids at heart? When I was a kid, we practically lived off of cereal (most of which were damn near made of pure sugar) and we turned out just fine. I know most cereals are probably discontinued because of minimal profit, but I am willing to bet many of these cereals got axed because they weren’t pulling in enough to rival Lucky Charms and Corn Flakes, not because they weren’t making them any money. Money was made, just not at the same level as the ridiculously popular ones.
Man. Sad. People should band together and create a new cereal company where they only make the old goodies. Yum.
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